People who attend training in structured thinking or negotiation usually expect to learn how to build persuasive arguments and present them convincingly. And they do. What often surprises them, however, is the amount of attention devoted to listening. During the programme or, later in their feedback, many participants remark that they had not anticipated how central listening would prove to be. Structured listening is the indispensable counterpart to structured communication.

I recently spoke with a client who described how a discussion within their organization turned into a complete standoff because no one was willing to give up their share of the budget. Everyone was firmly stuck in their positions, and the meeting ended without agreement and with a sense that no real progress had been made toward mutual understanding.